Category: Uncategorized

tyrantisterror:

Bram Stoker’s Novel Dracula: the story of a ragtag team led by a music teacher fending off the attempted conquest of London by an ancient Imperialist aristocrat that literally feeds off of the blood of those he conquers.

1960′s Soap Opera Dark Shadows: the story of, among other things, a tragic vampire who seeks out the reincarnation of his long dead lover while dealing with the horror of becoming a demonic creature of the night.

At Least 60% of Dracula Adaptations, Including the One that Has the Fucking Gall to Call Itself Bram Stoker’s Dracula: 

the story of a tragic vampire who seeks out the reincarnation of his long dead lover while dealing with the horror of becoming a demonic creature of the night.

stephendann:

darkestelemental616:

borealaries:

theresoneofyou:

princezane:

latessitrice:

absinthenoir:

fuckrealityihaveablog:

I want a story about an Italian vampire.

No romance, no action.

Just 200 pages of “What do you mean, I can’t have garlic? Do you know where I’m from?”

TBH I think the main issue would be the mirror thing

have you ever met an Italian man

the amount of time they spend looking in the mirror jfc

#the more you think about it the more all vampire rules are just anti-italian rules#can’t go out in sunlight?? IN ITALY???#Can’t go near crucifixes? IN ITALY???

a bunch of pissed off vampires stuck in Venice because they can’t go over moving water

Not to victim blame, but you’d have to be a pretty bad Italian to even get turned into a vampire in the first place.

the only two places practically immune to vampires are texas and italy

Let me tell you of A Thing.

Lithuania has no vampires, I guarantee it.

Lithuania has one vampire, and let me tell you, she’s gonna be FURY UNLEASHED once someone gets her out of the centre of that crossterfuck of a burial point.